Friday, December 23, 2005


reposted from 12 December 2005 on another, lamer, blog site

In September 2001, Luther was deployed. I was expecting the news, but I had to hear the reality by telephone from a hotel lobby in San Francisco. By the time I got home, he was gone.

In December, with our first Christmas as a married couple looming and Luther far from home, I went out to get a tree. We had a tiny two-bedroom apartment, with a room for the kids who were two states away, and a room for Luther and me and all the stuff that didn't fit elsewhere. There was a window in the livingroom that looked out on the apartment complex lot, an obvious place for some seasonal cheer. I like being by myself, but at that time, it was heart-breakingly lonely.

After getting the tree, I wanted to feel sorry for myself. I like the Christmas season for the sappiness, and I fully intended to enjoy it. Some wine or beer, some chips and dip, a romantic movie guaranteed to make me cry... all these things seemed more appropriate than ever.

At Eckerd's for some chips, I found this reindeer ornament. It remains my "Luther is far from home" memory, but it is also beautiful.

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