Sex education

Remember, kids. There are only a few 100% methods of avoiding pregnancy:

1. Abstinence. I don't like that there's no real sex education in the schools, but I gotta say the abstinence option should always be at least pointed out. It is an option. You will not make a baby through abstinence.
   
2. Homosexual sex. We should promote this more. And educate people on how to have safe homosexual sex. Homosexual sex produces fewer unwanted pregnancies than heterosexual sex BY FAR. Just look at the statistics. Homosexual sex pregnancies: 0% in 2005. Let's have more homosexual sex, people!
   
3. Above all else, keep your distance from test tubes. If you must go near them, watch them very carefully. These are tricky bastards. Test tubes will get you pregnant before homosexual sex will. Watch yourself.

That is all. Next week we will talk about the good diseases versus the bad diseases. See you then.